3am. And I was putting on my night moisturiser, looking at my reflection when reality seeped in deeper than it usually does.
“Wow, I can’t believe I’m having the life I’m having now.”
Not in a OMG-it’s-so-good-i-can’t-believe-it way. But tell me I’ll be exactly where I am right now in terms of emotional growth, career and romantic love 18 months ago and I would tell you off for bullshitting me.
I was 24 last year. And that was also the year I finally called myself a woman – a properly grown up adult. My adulthood came a little later than your average 21. The truth was that I never felt like I developed mentally nor emotionally till I was 24.
I went through heartbreak – like most women would in their lifetime but many deal with it in different ways thus, not everyone comes out of it the same. Some more cynical; some more hopeful. Some destroyed; some empowered. Some succumbed; some trumped.
I would like to think I took on all the positive cards. I went through loneliness like I’d never before, weak and depressive thoughts that I thought I never would. But I dealt with it like many of us do and did.
I came out of it still a hopeless idealist in love and more at peace in my own company than I ever was. And I thought maybe that’s it to growing.
I remember how I kept telling Karen how excited I was about my life cos I could literally feel anything and everything could happen and god, it so did.
I met and fell for a guy who loved and adored me so much that I never knew I could be loved this way. My dream of working and living in another city and travelling to many others fell onto my lap. And my dream of finding a lovely place of my own in a foreign city also fell right into my path.
Getting my own place was one of the many thoughts that kept obsessing my mind. But I knew with all my travelling and the upcoming festive periods, I had to hold off my apartment hunt. Then, the apartment happened (more on this another day).
It’s truly lovely how when you’re keeping positive thoughts and sending likewise positive messages out, the Universe just does its bits to get you what you wish for. It’s times like that that makes me really believe in the power of karma.
Gawd, I’m getting all spiritual here. It could be the book I just finished – Eat, Pray, Love. A great book that Hanafi and Cat got me as a farewell gift. I swear, the book’s arrival could never be more timely. Was that a sign as well?
So what I’m saying is that, when you think you’ve reached the end of your personal evolution, fat hope. Whatever change you are going through, it’s always and only just the beginning.
;)
